I'm re-watching S1. But Angel, Spike, Giles, Xander, OZ, etc either required saving from someone else, themselves, or to be defeated. So all qualify. They weren't the hero of the series - that was Buffy, and to a lesser extent Willow. The damsel was mainly, with the exception of Willow (early seasons), Cordy (early seasons) and Dawn (season 5-6), men. Which was a huge trope change in regards to 20th Century television series, and early 00s. Buffy was kind of a game-changer.
Yes, absolutely. I'm not disagreeing with your original statement at all. Buffy is unquestionably the hero (with all the complications that implies). I just feel like all the male characters have more or less equal narrative weight, so when you said "the man" (as if a "normal" narrative would have made him the hero of the story) I didn't know which one you meant. Sorry if I've been unclear.
That's okay. Although generally speaking I meant all of them? But in S1 - it's basically just Xander and Giles. Angel lurks. Xander kind of saves Buffy from drowning, but it's unclear. In S2, Angel is a damsel, as is Cordelia, Willow, Xander, and basically everyone but Buffy. Spike is a bad guy up until halfway through, then helps Buffy (although I wouldn't call his actions heroic - he has an agenda), Angel turns into a villain, and Giles is the damsel. In S3, Xander, Willow, Cordelia are all damsels, Angel mainly lurks and broods, and yes, also is a damsel, Faith is the bad guy, and Buffy the hero. In S4 - Riley is the damsel, Spike is a damsel/a bad guy/and occasionally helpful, Angel comes and mainly lurks, Oz is a damsel, Willow is a damsel, Xander is a damsel, and in S5, Spike is the damsel and helps, Xander is a damsel and helps...honestly they have the boys be the damsels in this show consistently throughout, it's rather impressive.
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