Oh, interesting! I hadn't looked at it that way yet. (And I'm not sure Joss Whedon was self-aware enough to consciously do this?) But the show does it really well indeed
I really didn't see it either until now? Mainly because back then much like everyone else, I'd normalized the behavior and thought little of it? Sad but true.
But, Whedon liked to examine abuses of power and was self-critical and self-deprecating in his writing and required the same from his writing team, often bullying them into it. He got a lot of criticism for not putting Xander and Buffy together, and having the male characters come across as toxic, but he was also intent on writing a subversion of the slasher/horror films/series and teen films that he grew up watching in the 70s, 80s and early 90s. Also, he had all the writers/himself included told to write about their worst day ever, their most embarrassing moment, or the thing they did in high school that they regretted the most. And I have a feeling he created the character of Xander as not a tribute to himself but a critique and he may well have been unconsciously per those guidelines punishing the toxic behavior of the incel instead of rewarding it? I never noticed it before now. I was somewhat surprised by it to be honest. I'm not entirely sure if he was aware of doing it, but I do know that when he turned Xander sadistic in The Pack, the first time they commented on the incel, and then again, with Xander in Bewitched Bothered and Bewildered - that yes, they were doing that.
Another bit to keep in mind? Whedon wasn't alone in the enterprise, he may have been the principal show-runner? But he had producing partners that had a say, along with a lot of other writers, etc. He didn't write, direct and produce every episode like Noah Hawley did with Fargo (for the most part). He didn't direct or write over 90% of them. And the Xander episodes tended to be written by other people. Marti Noxon wrote Xander most of them in S2. I don't think Whedon wrote a lot of Xander's dialogue.
Regarding Xander
I really didn't see it either until now? Mainly because back then much like everyone else, I'd normalized the behavior and thought little of it? Sad but true.
But, Whedon liked to examine abuses of power and was self-critical and self-deprecating in his writing and required the same from his writing team, often bullying them into it. He got a lot of criticism for not putting Xander and Buffy together, and having the male characters come across as toxic, but he was also intent on writing a subversion of the slasher/horror films/series and teen films that he grew up watching in the 70s, 80s and early 90s. Also, he had all the writers/himself included told to write about their worst day ever, their most embarrassing moment, or the thing they did in high school that they regretted the most. And I have a feeling he created the character of Xander as not a tribute to himself but a critique and he may well have been unconsciously per those guidelines punishing the toxic behavior of the incel instead of rewarding it? I never noticed it before now. I was somewhat surprised by it to be honest. I'm not entirely sure if he was aware of doing it, but I do know that when he turned Xander sadistic in The Pack, the first time they commented on the incel, and then again, with Xander in Bewitched Bothered and Bewildered - that yes, they were doing that.
Another bit to keep in mind? Whedon wasn't alone in the enterprise, he may have been the principal show-runner? But he had producing partners that had a say, along with a lot of other writers, etc. He didn't write, direct and produce every episode like Noah Hawley did with Fargo (for the most part).
He didn't direct or write over 90% of them. And the Xander episodes tended to be written by other people. Marti Noxon wrote Xander most of them in S2. I don't think Whedon wrote a lot of Xander's dialogue.